


Finding What Was Never Lost

by TheBeautifulLove



Category: Block B, K-pop
Genre: Angst, Attempt at Humor, Drinking, Fluff, M/M, Romance, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 12:05:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13570245
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBeautifulLove/pseuds/TheBeautifulLove
Summary: Jiho knows this is dangerous but he watches the other boy anyway. He always loved that expression on Kyung’s face – soft; big eyes shining, blinking slowly with the tiniest smile showing on his lips. He now regrets never asking what the other is thinking when he looks at him like that.Or:They're drunk, coming back from a party at the company celebrating their new album. Jiho only wants to make sure the other gets home safe then return to his own house and sleep but something makes him stay. It truly has been too long





	Finding What Was Never Lost

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, everyone! I really don't know what this is. I should be writing my other fanfic but I recently got into Block B and this wouldn't leave my head... Hope you enjoy :) x

The colours of the city seem brighter tonight when he takes them all in with his intoxicated, tired gaze. His soul and his mind feels so light, so he knows he’s still drunk but he recognises the neighbourhood they are passing by without hesitation.

Jiho can get drunk fast but he sobers up quite quickly too. The same can’t be said about his long-time friend, who’s currently sitting next to him in the cab, pressing into Jiho’s side; big, charismatic eyes now closed, arms crossed on his chest. The younger looks down at him for a second longer, his thoughts swimming freely when the driver interrupts them.

The man speaks quietly, presumably not to wake up Kyung, so Jiho doesn’t understand him properly.

‘Sorry?’ He leans forward to hear it better.

‘We’re nearly there.’ The driver repeats and Jiho nods, thanking him quietly.

Because of the leader’s sudden movement, Kyung stirs by his side waking up with a low groan. He looks at Jiho, those wide, confused eyes and the other can’t look away for a moment.

‘We’re nearly at your place.’ He repeats lamely what the driver said earlier. Kyung nods, smiling so wide it makes it evident he’s still really drunk.

Kyung suddenly turns to the driver, pointing to Jiho with one hand. ‘Do you know perhaps who this is, sir?’ Without waiting for the answer, he continues. ‘He’s a famous rapper, a real celebrity - Zico.’

The man in question looks down, slightly embarrassed even though the driver confirms he has heard of him.

‘He’s my best friend, I still can’t sometimes believe the Zico is my best friend.’ The older slurs excitedly. He has a habit of telling such things to people when he’s drunk, especially random strangers. ‘We met when we were teens, he’s my best friend and he was m-‘

Jiho coughs loudly and starts urgently. ‘Please, excuse my friend, we had a celebration party at the company tonight… He can talk endlessly when drunk.’

The man at the steering wheel however just nods and smiles a little, remaining perfectly calm. ‘We’re all just human in the end. Whoever we are – doctors, idols or actors, we are just normal people with needs and wants above all that.’

There is something so accepting in the man’s voice that Jiho thinks he might be implying something else than just drinking alcohol. It’s like he knows what Kyung was about to say anyway, even though Jiho saved it at the right moment.

He wants to ponder it for a bit longer but they are already parking in front of the tall apartment complex. Jiho looks back at the boy beside him who is now clinging to his arm like it’s a cuddly toy, eyes closed again, a small smile still at the corners of his lips. He always looked so adorable sleeping like this.

After finally succeeding in pushing a half-sleeping Kyung out of the car, Jiho pays the driver and wonders whether to have him wait or not. He turns his head to see what happened when he hears a thud behind him and he sees the other rapper now on the ground, laughing and wincing in pain at the same time as if he’s gone crazy.

The leader sighs and turns back to the driver. ‘You shouldn’t wait, it might take some time. I’ll call another cab later.’

The man nods shortly and tells him goodnight, although it’s almost morning.

The growl of the engine as the car drives away and Kyung’s constant whines are the only sounds in the late night now. The fresh air feels like a blessing on Jiho’s hot face when he bends down to pick up his hyung.

‘C’mon, let get you inside.’

The other hooks his arm around Jiho’s waist like they’ve done that hundred times before. They have. They have done it before too many times to count. Almost automatically Jiho tilts his head to the side to let Kyung rest his in the crook of his neck. They walk like that to the door; for a moment if feels like nothing changed from the old days. As if they didn’t actually get to debut in a group together like they dreamed, as if they didn’t take that long break to progress their solo careers, as if they didn’t produce the new album. It feels like they’re coming back from one of those underground rapping clubs they used to go to, not a fancy party at the company to celebrate the said new album.

Jiho holds out his hand for the key when they’re at the door, trying to ignore how Kyung practically leans his whole weight on him, breathing so close to his face.

‘Kyung?’ The older looks at the outstretched hand and takes it slowly into his own very warm one, looking at Jiho with shining eyes and biting his bottom lip.

He must be really drunk if he’s this flirty. ‘Give me the key, you idiot.’ Jiho shakes his own hand out of Kyung’s grasp.

‘Ah, sorry.’ He blinks a few times in realisation and starts to pat his pockets. After, a long moment he’s still searching and Jiho starts losing his patience.

‘If you tell me you lost it, I will murder you tonight.’

Kyung just laughs and keeps searching calmly, becoming slightly more serious and finally pulling out a piece of silver metal from his back pocket. He holds it triumphantly in front of the leader’s face. ‘I haven’t lost it.’ He watches Jiho roll his eyes at him then adds less enthusiastically. ‘Although the 50,000 won that should be in my pocket along with the key is no longer there, so…’

Jiho sighs yet again but can’t help laughing when Kyung starts giggling uncontrollably beside him. ‘Ah, what to do with you, Park Kyung?’ he asks rhetorically, taking the small key from him and unlocking the heavy, wooden door.

The alcohol still very present in Jiho’s system and the heavy Kyung leaning on him, make him stumble and they both nearly fall at the entrance.

‘Where is the light switch?’ Jiho asks feeling the smooth wall under his fingers in the darkness.

‘How should I know?’

‘Well, it is your freaking apartment, isn’t it?

‘You’ve been here before, though.’

‘I didn’t think at the time it would be this useful to memorise where all the light switches are.’

Kyung sneaks his arms around Jiho’s neck and he laughs freely, not helping to find the damned switch. The bubbly laughter rings so close to the other’s ear, sending shivers down his spine. ‘It can’t be too far away from the door…’ Kyung suggests carelessly between laughs.

Jiho suddenly feels something different on the wall under his hand and there it is. He pushes the boy currently clinging to him lightly against the wall to reach it better. An almost inaudible click and the light that illuminates the room forces them both blink rapidly a couple of times before their eyes adjust.

Jiho is glad for the light in the spacious living room only for a few seconds before he takes in the position they ended up in. Jiho pressing Kyung into the cream coloured wall in front of him with his own body, one hand on his friend’s waist, protective, so that the drunk idiot doesn’t fall and the other still resting on the wall at the same level as Kyung’s head. The older doesn’t look like he’ll release the tight grasp his hands have on the leader’s neck anytime soon either.

Kyung smiles a little and his eyes start to sparkle at the realisation while Jiho blushes and avoids the other’s eyes. The younger boy manages to escape from the embrace after a long moment, scared that if he locks eyes with the other it will be too much. Instead, he heads to where he remembers the kitchen should be. He turns around halfway there, acting casually.

‘I’ll get us some water. You need to sober up.’ He fills in the painful silence with useless syllables but his eyes linger on the other boy rooted in the same position against the wall but with his arms now down his sides. The look in his eyes is a mixture of regret, sadness and curiosity, lips slightly parted as if he was about to say something but gave up.

Jiho pulls out two cups from the cupboard and pours in some water. He drinks greedily from one of the cups, suddenly thirsty and immediately refills it again. He hears unsteady footsteps and turns to see Kyung leaning now against the counter by the door as if afraid to come in further. He’s not wearing his jacket anymore, Jiho notices, the white shirt creased in places from wearing it all night and the black tie loose around the messy collar.

Jiho knows this is dangerous but he watches the other boy anyway. He always loved that expression on Kyung’s face – soft; big eyes shining, blinking slowly with the tiniest smile showing on his lips. He now regrets never asking what the other is thinking when he looks at him like that.

He was always secretly too scared he might like the answer a bit too much.

The leader doesn’t know what to say so he holds up the glass, motioning for Kyung to come and take it. He’s surprised when the other hesitates at first before walking the short distance slowly.

‘Last time you were in my kitchen, you weren’t running away from me.’

How does he manage to sound so sober while being so drunk? He suddenly wants the silly, giggly boy back. Jiho is too sobered up for serious conversations. Maybe instead of the water he should have given him another beer and hope he finally blacks out completely. That would be safe. That would be selfish.

Kyung drinks slowly, lips placed on the edge of the glass but eyes fixed on Jiho.

‘I’m not running away from you.’

The older laughs taking the glass away from his pink, glistening lips. ‘You make lies sound so believable. How do you do that?’

Jiho ignores the question, biting his lip and grabbing the other’s hand leading him to the bedroom. It’s stupid. Completely messed up how much he likes the little gasp leaving Kyung’s mouth and how much he missed the feeling of their fingers intertwining.

When they stand by the bed, Jiho rips out the glass still clutched in the other’s hand, empty now because Kyung spilled the rest of the water on the way. He puts it calmly on the table by the bed and switches on the antique lamp, lighting up the room. He looks at Kyung who watches him with curious expression.

‘You should sleep it off.’ Jiho suggests.

‘I don’t want to sleep.’

‘You should.’

‘Will you stay with me?’

‘I shouldn’t.’

Kyung laughs at him humourlessly, hopelessly.

‘Seriously, go to sleep, Kyung.’ Jiho pushes him onto the bed but the other grabs his shirt and pulls him down with him.

Jiho ends up hovering over his hyung, supporting his weight with hands on either side of his head, pressing into the soft mattress. His mind fills with memories he desperately tries not to show on his face but the blush spreads on his cheeks anyway. Thankfully, the dim light and the alcohol running in Kyung’s veins saves him tonight. He’s about to lift himself up when his friend’s voice stops him.

‘They’re stealing you from me. You used to be only mine.’

He knows he shouldn’t but he glances at the man underneath him. Sad, regretful smile, glassy eyes, messy hair, unbuttoned shirt revealing smooth skin and it suddenly becomes difficult to even breathe.

‘Who is stealing me?’ He knows how to remain calm in those difficult situations, that’s why he’s the leader. However, his voice comes out slightly shaky.

‘All of them.’ Kyung mumbles tiredly. ‘CEOs, rappers, girls, fans, cameras. I’m gonna lose you completely one day.’

There is silence for a moment. ‘Move.’ Jiho shoves Kyung further into the centre of the bed, making some space for himself. The older lies spread out lazily on the purple covers, watching Jiho through half-closed eye lids only slightly surprised. Jiho sits cross-legged facing his friend.

‘What are you doing?’ Kyung asks carefully when the other keeps eye contact with him like he always does when he’s being serious.

Jiho ignores the question and fires away his own instead. ‘How can you say that? How can you say you’re gonna lose me when every single fucking time something happens to me, no matter if it’s good or bad, you’re the first person I tell? When I have problems, I call you knowing you’ll always try to help me. When I’m happy I can’t wait to tell you first. I can’t wait to see your smile, for you to tell me you’re proud of me, for you to hug me, for you to…’ Only then the confidence in his voice wavers and he looks away from Kyung’s eyes, knowing he spoke too much.

However, Park Kyung can sometimes be a devil behind his angelic smile. He sits up on the bed, much closer to Jiho, eyes shining, small smirk playing on his lips. ‘You can’t wait for me to do what?’

‘For you to…’ Jiho risks looking up into those eyes and the answer rolls off his tongue like it has been there, ready for so long. ‘…kiss me.’

It’s all been for nothing in the end. All the pretending, the whole act. All it takes is a little alcohol, a little happiness, a little freedom from their busy schedules and two words whispered with such sincerity. Two short words that Kyung’s been wishing to hear from the moment Jiho and he promised each other to end whatever was between them because now they have a team, because it’s not just the two of them against the world anymore, because they have responsibilities now, because only hard work and full focus will lead them to the bright future they’ve always dreamed of.

None of them ever mentioned how instead of brighter, it suddenly got darker between them when they took that step away. They were so young then though; they wanted to be successful and with the other five talented people beside them it could finally become true. They knew they had to sacrifice one thing for another. They wanted to be recognised for their talent and starting a career with a scandal wouldn’t help.

It took some time to forget; it took some time to learn to be just friends again. It took some time to convince themselves they were once, long time ago, in lust and not in love.

Two words and the memories repressed for years come flooding back in. One spark and the fire begins to smoulder again.

With shaky hands and alcohol induced confidence, Kyung reaches out to bring them closer and fulfil that sweet, shy request, whispered in that same beautiful voice that hasn’t changed no matter how much time has passed.

Unsurprisingly, their lips fit together in the same, delightful way they did back then too. They slide and lock in place like they always belonged there. It’s sweet and slow because they need to make up for all the time they lost and seven years is a fucking long time, so Jiho weaves his long fingers into the other’s soft hair without any rush; feeling, taking in, remembering.

Kyung runs his fingertips along Jiho’s hips gently at first, barely touching but then he presses his whole palms onto the hot skin greedily, scared that it’s not real, that he’s having another one of those drunken, way too realistic dreams that he will hate himself for having once he wakes up. Yet the small moans and whines escaping Jiho’s lips every now and then when they part for no longer than a millisecond are too beautiful to be just a dream. Even Kyung’s smart brain wouldn’t be able to create those gorgeous noises on its own.

It’s real. Somewhere in a small apartment in central Seoul, South Korea, Woo Jiho and Park Kyung are kissing again after seven, long years.

They pull away finally, short, ragged breaths echo against the silence of the huge, dim bedroom. Maybe it’s the alcohol, maybe it’s the kiss but Kyung wants to cry right now seeing Jiho like this in his arms again - red, glistening lips, eyes closed, panting for air like the day they kissed for the first time: the freezing, winter wind and the naïve excitement was making them shiver despite the big, puffy jackets they wore. Jiho was pressing the shorter boy into the back wall of the school building late at night; their cheeks were pink from the cold but their lips were so wonderfully warm.

‘Like this?’ Kyung asks breathlessly.

Jiho opens his eyes but he can’t get his thoughts together quick enough to answer straight away. He looks at the boy before him, older now, more mature now but still so bright, so beautiful. He stares at the features on his handsome face he knows by heart anyway.

‘Yeah.’ he finally answers. He smiles seeing the expression on Kyung’s face. He always liked to call it lovestruck in his mind. ‘Just like this.’

And Kyung falls in love with a man he never really stopped loving in the first place and yes it was love, not just lust, and love it still is. So, he kisses those dark, swollen lips again, harder this time like their time is suddenly running away. It has been seven, too long years that went by in a blink of an eye and even now the sun starts to wake up outside already, rays of soft orange and light amber barging in into the room uninvited.

It seems time is not their biggest fan. That’s okay. They’ll make the best of what they have just like they always do.

When Jiho bites lightly on his bottom lip, Kyung digs his short nails into the soft skin of his back, under the white cotton t-shirt in an automatic response, almost sitting on the leader’s lap now. Jiho starts to laugh into the kiss from mere happiness and they part away again. The taller boy puts his arms around the other’s neck and continues to laugh quietly resting his head on Kyung’s shoulder.

‘I missed you too fucking much.’ Jiho admits and exhales loudly, tiredly, deeply. After such long turmoil, his heart feels like it’s finally at peace.

‘Me too.’ Kyung draws little, comforting circles on the leader’s bare back. They don’t need to talk, they never did. They read each other’s mind but they still liked to talk, to hear those reassuring words. Even the sheer sound of the other’s voice was enough to put their minds at rest, to balance everything out.

The sun is high up in the sky, bright and golden when they lie down to get some needed sleep. The day is slowly starting, everyone waking up from their dreams to get on with the day ahead when the two boys finally fall asleep under the soft covers, in each other’s arms.

It’s all so wrong, so backwards, so unnatural. They go against the order, against the rules, against the norm. Then again, they’ve always done that. In their songs, in their lyrics, in their relationship.

_Unusual_. They define that word.

It’s them. It’s _perfect_.


End file.
